Say Huh? Karaoke II
by Jadyn
Summary: The first ever karaoke contest for wrestlers has a sequel! And I ain't sorry for it! *maniacal laughter*
1. Here We Go Again...

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Say Huh? Karaoke II

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Here We Go Again…

Disclaimer: The wrestlers used in this debauchery of MTV belong to WWE. Zim and Gir are the brainchildren of Jhonen Vasquez, but belong to Nickelodeon. Professor Severus Snape belongs to J.K. Rowling, no matter how many women want him. Shelly, as always, owns herself.

Author's Note: What have I done?

--*

-JADYN enters onto a stage, which has magically appeared. Considering how shallow she is, and how much Versace she's wearing, she looks rather grumpy-

JADYN: Well, folks, somehow you managed it. You squeezed another horror out of us. And this time, it's a sequel to the well-received "Say Huh? Karaoke", which was just an MTV rip-off in the first place. And because we got more than five reviews, we got an expanded budget. You know what that means. SHOWGIRLS!

-There is a scream from the AUDIENCE, again being held against their wills. Twelve SHOWGIRLS parade out, wearing feathers. A lot of feathers -

JADYN: Ugh. Anyway, I suppose I should introduce you to the judges now. Judging lyrics, from Planet Earth, they are a perfectly normal human worm baby and dog creature. From "Invader Zim", Zim and Gir!

-Applause-

Zim: That's right, just a normal human. Not an alien, no. Where did you get that idea?!

GIR: Ooooooh, taquitos….

JADYN: No, Gir, there are no taquitos. Anyway, the next judge is style. He's a very dismal Potions Master from Hogwarts, and he hates Harry Potter. Welcome me in joining Professor Severus Snape!

-Less enthusiastic applause, probably because SNAPE is nowhere near as cute as GIR-

SNAPE: Thank you, Jadyn.

JADYN: You're welcome. And finally, judging on overall style, as always, Shelly.

-Crickets chirping-

SHELLY: Hey!

JADYN: Story of my life, babe. Anyway, the first contestant is a tiny little black woman. Welcome Jackie!

-Applause-

JACKIE: Hi!

JADYN: So, Jackie, what are going to sing?

JACKIE: "Waiting For Tonight", by Jennifer Lopez. Tee hee!

JADYN: Yeah, okay. Here she is, Jackie, singing "Waiting for Tonight".

JACKIE: _Like a movie scene, from my sweetest dreams_

I had pictured us together.

Then to feel your lips on my fingertips

I had to say, was even better 

__

Than I ever thought it could possibly be,

It was perfect, and passion, and it set me free.

But you brought me back to the tears that I've cried.

Al Snow, please fear for your life…

Waiting for the night,

Oh oh oh.

When you would be easy to harm

Waiting for the night

Oh oh oh

I'd dreamed of that love for so long,

Waiting for the night

Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh

Tender words you said,

But you ran back to Head.

Told me then you'd leave me never.

Lies defy your face,

Cold is your embrace.

I hope you lay in pain forever.

I think of the days when the sun used to set,

On both of us, entwined, curled up in my bed.

Never did say, but emotions were strong.

When you left, I had to hold on.

Waiting for the night,

Oh oh oh.

When you would be easy to harm

Waiting for the night

Oh oh oh

I'd dreamed of that love for so long,

Waiting for the night

Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh

_Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh_

I think of the days when the sun used to set,

On both of us, entwined, curled up in my bed.

Never did say, but emotions were strong.

When you left, I had to hold on.

Waiting for the night,

Oh oh oh.

When you would be easy to harm

Waiting for the night

Oh oh oh

I'd dreamed of that love for so long,

Waiting for the night

Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh

-Silence. AL SNOW quietly sneaks out-

JADYN: Uh, judges?

ZIM: Ahahahaha! Destruction of humans -I mean, people. I love it! Ten!

GIR: Aw, why didn't she explode?

JADYN: Okay… Professor?

SNAPE: -tonelessly- Two.

JACKIE: Five! What the hell? You bastard, I'm gonna…

-JACKIE gets restrained-

JADYN: Get it over with, Shelly.

SHELLY: Hell, I'll give her a nine, just so she doesn't kick my ass!

JADYN: Okay, Jackie,. That makes your score twenty-one. You can go sit down now.

-JACKIE is still trying to get at SNAPE, who is glaring at her-

JADYN: -yelling in JACKIE'S ear- Go. Sit. Down. -to at-home-viewers- Turn it off. Now. Please. Come on! I beg of-

-Commercial break! Do you have what it takes to come back?- 


	2. Uh-oh, We're In Trouble...

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Say Huh? Karaoke II

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Uh-oh, We're In Trouble…

Disclaimer: Revert to chapter one. Also, Kitten (Starfallen, morons) owns herself, as I have entered her into the madness.

Author's Note: Dear god. Someone strike me with lightening. Right now. -Al Snow muse throws a lightening bolt- Hey! Come back here bastard! Don't make me release the *secret* story! Cackle cackle!

--*

-JADYN is seen sitting at the end of the stage weeping. She looks up and sees the camera, and abruptly stops-

JADYN: Uh, welcome back to Say Huh? Karaoke II. God save your souls for returning. And now, again, your judges. From "Invader ZIM", Zim and Gir!

ZIM: Clap, puny human garbage! Clap!

GIR: -laughs maniacally- I don't know! Huh?! 

JADYN: Whatever. Next, from the "Harry Potter" series and movie, Professor Severus Snape. 

SNAPE: Yes, yes. Will this take much longer?

JADYN: No, hopefully not. And finally… -sigh- Shelly.

SHELLY: I wanna say hi to my mom, my dad, my brother, all my friends and-and AHHHHHH!

-SHELLY is escorted from the vicinity by men in pretty white jackets-

JADYN: Oh, dear. It seems Shelly's had a breakdown. -evil grin- I guess we have to bring in the alternate judge…

-KITTEN runs in, screaming nonsense and dragging an unwilling TAJIRI-KUN behind her-

AUDIENCE: Kitten, Kitten, Kitten, Kitten…

-KITTEN grins and holds up her copy of "Hypnotism For Total Morons Like You"-

JADYN: Hey, Kitten-chan! I missed you! What's up?

KITTEN: Tajiri-kun was bad and tried to stake Lestat. So now he lost his privileges.

JADYN: Oh, Tajiri-kun! I told you to be good while Kitten baby-sat you! Is Lestat okay?

KITTEN: Yes. But now-

SNAPE: Can we get on with this?!

JADYN: Alright, I guess. Our next contestant is a Canadian cutie who calls himself the "Living Legend" But it's okay because he's sexy and junk. Here he is…

JADYN and KITTEN: Jericho!!

-JERICHO parades out, grinning. Until he sees KITTEN. Because he knows he'll be bombarded with…-

KITTEN: Glomp! XD

JADYN: Kitten, get off the hottie-hottie-hot-hot. Okay, Jericho, baby boo, whatcha gonna sing, huh? 

JERICHO: I'm going to sing "Can't Get You Out My Head" by Kylie Minogue.

JUDGES: O.o

JADYN: Okay, here's the sexy, hot, cute, fine, lovely, sparkly and pretty Jericho singing "Can't Get You Out Of My Head"!

JERICHO: _La la la, lala la la la_

I just can't get me outta my head,

Oh, yeah, I am all I think about

I just can't get me outta my head

All you assclowns are too dumb to think about

Every night, every day, 

Just to admire my face

I will stay

You can pray

I'll stay pretty, so pretty, yeah yeah

La la la, lala la la la

I just can't get me outta my head

Oh, yeah, I am all I think about

I just can't get me outta my head

All you assclowns are to dumb to think about

There's a dark secret in me…

I had plastic surgery!

On my lips,

And my hips, yeah

And some on my butt, nose and ears…

La la la, lala la la la

I just can't get me outta my head

Oh, yeah, I am all I think about

I just can't get me outta my head

All you assclowns are to dumb to think about

JADYN: Freaky, dude. But you're still hot, my surgically-enhanced cutie. Judges?

ZIM: Nine, because he sang of the greatness of ZIM!

GIR: -dazed- The greatness of ZIIIIIM! 

JERICHO: But I didn't.

JADYN: Shut up, you're ahead. Sevvy?

SNAPE: Three, because you called me that.

-JERICHO attempts to injure JADYN-

JADYN: -running around- Kitten?

-Suddenly, men in pretty white coats enter, dropping a strait-jacketed SHELLY on the floor-

MAN #1: Take her back! We don't want her!

SHELLY: This is the song that never ends, yes it goes on and on my friends! 

-The men leave. JADYN is still running away from JERICHO, and has somehow managed to fall over SHELLY, who is sitting on the floor admiring her toes-

JADYN: Kitten, can we get Chris's score?

KITTEN: -trembles, then screams- TENNNNNN! 

JADYN: Okay, good. Chris, your score is twenty-two! STOP CHASING ME! Join us after the break!

SHELLY: AIIIIIIIE! Moosejaw! WHERE DID THE PRETTY ANGEL-COOKIES GO???? 

-Come back for the next chapter and see if Shelly gets any saner!- 


	3. Oops!...What's That, Rock?

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Say Huh? Karaoke II

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Oops!…What's That, Rock?

Disclaimer: Chapters 1 and 2, please.

Author's Note: I really, really hope the Rock doesn't read fanfiction. 

--*

-JADYN is smacking a SHOWGIRL with GIR-

JADYN: We're back. Unh! Unh! Stupid ho! Anyway, our next contestant is a pie-eatin' piece of beefcake! Welcome… Rock!

-ROCK walks onstage in his usual outfit. Those trackpants, and the shirt…-

JADYN: Rock, what are you going to…

ROCK: Finally! The Rock has come back to Say Huh? Karaoke!

JADYN: Back?

ROCK: Yes, the Rock is back! As Eminem would say, it feels so empty without Rock!

JADYN: When were you here before?

ROCK: It doesn't matter when Rock was here before! What matters is what Rock is going to sing and Rock is going to sing… "Oops!…Rock Did It Again" by the luscious Britney Spears!

JADYN: That's not the title of the song…

ROCK: It doesn't matter! I'm gonna take that song title, shine it up real nice, turn it sideways and stick it up your _candy ass_! 

JADYN: What?! Anyway, here's Rock singing "Oops!…Rock Did It Again".

-The lights dim, and when Rock turns around, he's wearing a red vinyl jumpsuit (you all know the one!) and a blonde wig-

ROCK: _Yeah, yeah_

Ooh, oh, yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah yeah

Yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah yeah

Oops!…Rock thinks he did it again

He made you believe

That Rock's a real man

Oh baby

If you really must know, 

My name is Dwayne, 

And wrestling's a show

Cause I want all you fans

To know The Rock is just me!

Oh baby, baby

Oops!…Rock did it again

He played with your hearts

While beating up men

Oh baby, baby

Oops!…you all fell in love

You think Rock's sent from above?

Ha! That's a good one!

You see, the problem is this

You're all not that bright

Wishing that Rock and Stone Cold do exist

I cry, looking at signs

Cause you see, you're all fools

Do you really think I'll marry you?

Cause I want all you fans

To know The Rock is just me

Oh baby, baby

Oops!…Rock did it again

He played with your hearts

While beating up men

Oh baby, baby

Oops!…you all fell in love

You think Rock's sent from above?

Ha! That's a good one!

Ooh, oh, yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah yeah

Yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah yeah

(The winner is…The Rock!)

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Rocky, there's something I want you to see…

Girl, they're fake. But wait a minute, isn't that..?

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Yeah, it is.

But I thought Mariah was in rehab!

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Well, baby, I went there and got her for you…

Aww, you shouldn't have!

Oops!…I did it again

Forgot that you'll believe anything

Oops!…you think that I'm sent from above

Ha! That's a good one!

Oops!…Rock did it again

He played with your hearts

While beating up men

Oh baby, baby

Oops!…you all fell in love

You think Rock's sent from above?

Ha! That's a good one!

JADYN: Wow. You put a lot of work into that, didn't you?

ROCK: More than you will ever know.

JADYN: Okay, let's go to our judges! Zim and Gir?

ZIM: I don't know. I didn't like it. Six.

ROCK: Six?

ZIM: Six.

GIR: Wheeeeeee!

JADYN: Severus?

SNAPE: Nine. 

JADYN: Now you give out good scores?!

SNAPE: Don't question my methods.

JADYN: Kitten and Shelly, your collective scores?

-KITTEN and SHELLY whisper…rather KITTEN whispers to SHELLY, who is drooling-

KITTEN: We'll give him a ten, because he put on that wig.

JADYN: Okay, Mr. Rock, that makes your score twenty-five. Now to bring out our other contestants…

-JACKIE and CHRIS JERICHO run out grinning-

JADYN: Now we have to let the contestant with least amount of points go. And today, that's Jackie!

JACKIE: What?! 

JADYN: But, you get this cool, uh, Al Snow punching bag? _Please don't kill me!_

JACKIE: Okay. That thing rocks!

-JACKIE takes her Al Snow punching bag and leaves. Now only CHRIS JERICHO and ROCK remain. Who will win? I dunno. Tune in and see!-

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	4. THE WHEEL OF CERTAIN EMBARRASSMENT

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Say Huh? Karaoke II

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THE WHEEL OF CERTAIN EMBARRASSMENT 

Disclaimer: Revert to chapters one and two. Also, the song _"I'm A Genie in A Bottle" _belongs to those Christina Aguilera people. The song _"I Want Your Sex"_ belongs to George Michael. 

Author's Note: I will go Hell. Most definitely. 

--*

-The SHOWGIRLS push out a large multicolored wheel, much like THE WHEEL OF ALMOST DEATH ™, except this one has dares written on the little blocky-things!-

JADYN: Welcome back. It's time for…THE WHEEL OF CERTAIN EMBARRASSMENT!

AUDIENCE: Gasp!

SHOWGIRLS: Gasp!

CHRIS JERICHO: Gasp!

ROCK: Gasp!

ZIM: Gasp!

GIR: Gasp!

SNAPE: Gasp!

KITTEN: Gasp!

PIERRE, THE FRENCH MAN: Le gasp!

JASPER, THE AUSTRALIAN MAN: Gasp, mate!

BUCKBEARD, THE PIRATE: Ahoy matey, gasp!

ELIZABETH, THE BRITISH WOMAN: Pip pip cheerio and all that rubbish, gasp!

PACO, THE SPANIARD: Ay yay yay, gasp!

EIN, THE DOG (who magically popped in): Bark bark, gasp!

SHELLY: Mooooo. 

JADYN: Okay then. Anyway, you spin this wheel and you have to do whatever it says. If you do it better than your opponent, than you win this…

MAN'S VOICE DUBBED OVER: Used band-aid.

JADYN: Okay, Chris, you go first.

-CHRIS JERICHO spins the wheel-

JADYN: Okay, the wheel has landed on "**SCRAPE FISH SCALES INTO YOUR PANTS WHILE SINGING CHRISTINA AGUILERA**"

CHRIS JERICHO: What? No!

JADYN: Okay, then I guess Rock will win…

CHRIS JERICHO: Fine! Give me the fish!

-JADYN hands him a large, slightly rotting fish. It smells. Can you not smell the fish?!-

CHRIS JERICHO: Eww. Okay, here goes…

It feels like I been locked up tight for a century of lonely nights,

Waiting for someone to release me…

(CHRIS'S pants are beginning to fill with fish scales…)

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You're licking your lips and blowin' kisses my way,

But that don't mean I'm gonna give it away,

Baby baby baby

(KITTEN screams "Work it! Work it!")

__

Oh oh oh

My body's sayin' let's go

Oh oh oh

But my heart is sayin' no

(JADYN helpfully empties a tin of anchovies down the back of his pants)

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If you wanna be with me

Baby, there's a price to pay.

I'm a genie in a bottle

You gotta rub me the right way

If you wanna be with me,

I can make your wish come true.

Just come and set me free, baby

And I'll be with you

I'm a genie in a bottle, baby

Gotta rub me the right way, honey

I'm a genie in a bottle, baby

Come come come on and let me out

(TAJIRI-KUN begins to sniff the anchovies…)

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The music's fadin', the light's down low,

Just one more dance and then we're good to go

Waitin' for someone who needs me

(TAJIRI-KUN bites down)

__

Hormones racin' at the speed of light,

But that don't mean it's gotta be tonight

Baby baby baby

(JADYN gives him a sombrero - which she takes the liberty of putting on his head)

__

Oh oh oh

My body's sayin' let's go

Oh oh oh

But my heart is sayin' no

(Oops! Was that cooking oil on the floor?)

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If you wanna be with me

Baby, there's a price to pay.

I'm a genie in a bottle

You gotta rub me the right way

If you wanna be with me,

I can make your wish come true.

Just come and set me free, baby

And I'll be with you

(SHELLY licks his cheek)

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I'm a genie in a bottle, baby   
You gotta rub me the right way, honey   
I'm a genie in a bottle, baby   
Come come come on and let me out 

I'm a genie in a bottle, baby   
You gotta rub me the right way, honey   
I'm a genie in a bottle, baby   
Come come come on and let me out

(SHELLY does a sacrificial dance around him)

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Oh oh oh

My body's sayin' let's go

Oh oh oh

But my heart is sayin' no

(KITTEN is sitting on the sombrero)

__

If you wanna be with me

Baby, there's a price to pay.

I'm a genie in a bottle

You gotta rub me the right way

If you wanna be with me,

I can make your wish come true.

Just come and set me free, baby

And I'll be with you

I'm a genie in a bottle, baby

Gotta rub me the right way, honey

I'm a genie in a bottle, baby

Come come come on and let me out

(SHELLY has tied CHRIS JERICHO to a pole. The fish has been forgotten.)

__

If you wanna be with me   
Baby, there's a price to pay   
I'm a genie in a bottle   
You gotta rub me the right way.   
If you wanna be with me,   
I can make your wish come true.   
Just come and set me free baby   
And I'll be with you 

I'm a genie in a bottle baby   
Come come come on and let me out 

JADYN: Well, that was great! Judges, what do you think?

ZIM: Eight.

SNAPE: Five.

KITTEN: Ten.

JADYN: Okay, that makes Chris's score…-counts on her fingers- forty-five! Rocky, your turn!

-ROCK spins the wheel very hard, hoping to land on something not-so-bad…-

JADYN: Okay, Rock, the wheel has landed on **"WRESTLE BROCK LESNAR WHILE SINGING GEORGE MICHAEL'S _"I WANT YOUR SEX"_" **

-ROCK collapses. JADYN revives him-

JADYN: Come on out, Brock!

-BROCK LESNAR comes out, ready to wrestle the first person he sees. This is because we kept him in a small cage for three weeks-

JADYN: Ready, Rock? Go!

ROCK: _Oh, so much love that you've never seen_

Let's make love, put your trust in me

(BROCK and ROCK begin to wrestle)

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Don't listen to what they told you

Because I love you

Let me hold you

Oh

(BROCK clotheslines ROCK)

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I'm not your father

I'm not your brother

Oh, will you ever change your mind?

I'm a gentle lover with a heart of gold

But, baby, you've been so unkind 

Oh

(BROCK pins ROCK for a two-count)

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Come on, 

I want your sex

Come on, I want your sex

That's right, all night

Oh, I want your sex

I want your… sex

(BROCK does an inverted spine-buster)

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Sexy babies (sexy babies)

Sexy body (sexy body)

Keeps me guessin'

With a promise

(ROCK rock-bottoms BROCK)

__

I know we can come together,

But the question is,

Will we ever?

(ROCK pins BROCK 1… 2 … 3!)

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Together - you and me

JADYN: Woohoo! And the winner is…Rock!

CHRIS JERICHO: Hey!

JADYN: I meant of the match. Judges?

ZIM: Eight.

GIR: wOOt!

SNAPE: Seven.

KITTEN: Ten.

SHELLY: Let's make biscuits! 

JADYN: That makes Rock's score…fifty! This makes Rock the winner! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!

CHRIS JERICHO: Oh, no, you don't, assclown!

JADYN: Hold on, Mr. Jericho, there's a runner-up prize.

-JADYN whispers in his ear. CHRIS'S eyes grow wide-

CHRIS JERICHO: 'Kay! Meet ya there!

KITTEN: Hey, you stole my man, bee-yatch! 

JADYN: Heh heh. Here ya go, Rocky. Here's your

MAN'S VOICE DUBBED OVER: Used band-aid.

JADYN: Gotta go!

KITTEN: Come back here, you man-stealing ho!

SNAPE: I'm going back to Hogwarts.

ZIM: Finally! I can take over! Mwuhahahahaha! 

GIR: I miss my cupcakes.

SHELLY: P-O-R-N-O, P-O-R-N-O, P-O-R-N-O and Bingo was his name-o…

SHOWGIRLS: We're goin' back to Vegas!

-Join us next time!-


End file.
